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ASMR, Shamans and the Saul Shaye rabbit hole

2024年5月3日金曜日 16:40 by [ - Alicia - ]
Tags [ - Spiritualism - ]

ASMR

I got into ASMR many many years ago, around 2012 or so, when my brother showed me a 3D sound roleplay of an interrogation chamber. It definitely left an impression on me, not only from the cool tech into it as it was my first exposure to 3D audio, but because in certain moments it’d literally send chills down my spine, and it was not about the content of the roleplay as much as feeling the sounds physically close to my ears, to the point I could practically feel the actor breathing down my neck.

While this was my first time experiencing an ASMR video, I’ve been sensitive to this phenomenon since younger, the one I experience the most to this day being a medical checkup.

As I looked for more of these 3D sound videos, I finally came across ASMR. What I found about it is that it was stupidly irritating to me, much of the tools used to create these sounds rely on really hard sounds against the microphone, like brushing, scratching… Not quite sure whether my autism is playing a part in my distaste for these, but all I can say for sure is that between this and the overwhelming amout of thirsty or sexual (and honestly disgusting) ASMR, makes it very hard for me to find ASMR I can personally enjoy.

That was until I finally came across what is called “Unintentional ASMR”, which as the name implies, is a recording of something that generates that relaxation or chills but without being purposely made to incite those feelings. No longer it’s a dumbass in front of a camera trying too hard to make sounds, they are natural sounds or experiences that actually relax me and give me that bliss.

(I may sound too harsh on regular ASMR creators, but there are some I genuinely can enjoy like Marno or Gibi)

Shamans

For years I took ASMR as a guilty pleasure of mine, it was something I enjoyed, but it wasn’t something I was proud to share or anything either. If anything it felt kinda embarrassing to share I liked it. Can you guess what was my one other guilty pleasure?

Esoteric or spiritual topics.

For the longest time I was also kind of ashamed of being into things like tarot, fancy rocks or rituals. It is really comfy to me and it was oddly relaxing in a way to watch people perform that sort of thing. You can figure out where I am going with this. Mixing unintentional ASMR with these esoteric interest was my gateway towards this world.

About 4 years ago, if I remember correctly, it was the year we were studying in another city, this channel uploaded a now deleted video highlighting 3 shamans performing limpias.

The first one was simply titled “Limpia” and is one of the videos I like to come back to. Like that thing he does in the end with his fingers, man, that gets me every time. This video on itself is its own rabbit hole, like, all the performances I’ve seen from this person have left the recipient of it either feeling sick or uncomfortable. I wonder if it’s about being hit with the leaves or what part is the one that nukes people.

The second video in this compilation was an episode of New mexico naturopathic medical (?) show. This show is an absolute thing. Back before knowing the actual date of the show, I just assumed it was some sort of digitalized VHS of a 90s esoteric show, but while browsing the comments it came to my attention in one of the episodes the host mentions her having a youtube channel. This blew me away, the quality of the camera, the glitchy video, hell even the clothes, how. No seriously, like HOW did they pull this off unintentionally.

As a bit of comment on this video, it is very interesting to me how he combines christianity, the angels with the pagan. Truth be told I’m not that knowledgeable on limpias, but from what I gather, in Mexico and South America they have their own deities, without going further the first video is from a temple worshiping la Santa Muerte.

It’s both kinda cool and kinda offputting to see the use of christian figures along the pagan. Although it seems more common than you’d think about, or at least, what I thought about. Earlier on March, while visiting Euskadi I walked into a few esoteric shops and the thing that shocked me the most were seeing candles for different saints, in order to ask for a blessing or help. I later corroborated this with an IRL of mine whom I shall quote:

"If you want to be a witch you need to hoard the power of saints and virgins, it is often easier to pray for something to a saint than to perform a ritual"

Which was a very interesting take, not one I personally share, but one that seriously got me to reconsider the importance of this sort of deities. Hell, even without really paying much attention to it, I’ve been asking “San Cucufato” whenever I or someone close to me has lost something.

Back to the video, or rather, what is relevant at the topic at hand, is the naturopathic show itself, I started developing a weird interest on it based in this one video, so the next natural step for me was to check the other videos it had published. While the videos I checked were mid and didn’t really make me feel much in terms of ASMR or spiritual enjoyment, I ended up finding one of the most viewed videos in the channel. He who walks on two worlds

The man in question

It’s hard to convey what this video made me feel back in the day knowing what I know now. Like I’ve been enlighted and I can’t go back to blissful ignorance.

In short, the video was very relaxing in terms of ASMR, but the real star was Mr. Shaye himself. He is an absolute show, measures the difference in height of the feet, goes beep boop at the air like he got some holographic screens, gives them a massage (if you can even call that a massage), legs are even, refuses to elaborate.

But the real thing that shocked me is how he, just like an NPC, knows his lines of dialogue and just can come out of them. For both his patients he just repeats the same script he apparently knows by heart now. He even replaces the specific words in the specific positions as if they were blanks to customize the experience.

Like, I can’t stress this enough, he is placing the “customized responses” on the same exact spots in his checklist. Which makes me think, what even is he even noting down on that clipboard? It’s clear he knows his lines, so I don’t really think it is a script. I’m not quite sure what it is there.

This is just one of the examples in the video. For the introduction he also says the same script for both the guests. There are two sides to this, in one side there is the autistic me, looking for asmr, getting served with a warm low voice, silence and hand movements and soothin repetition. In the other, the unavoidable thought that this is the most shameless healer I’ve ever seen, just a con artist, he probably doesn’t even believe in what’s he’s doing.

Generally with divination, healings and so on, my problem is not so much with the practice as it is about the ethics of the performer, like in my case, even if I were to charge for tarot reads, there are limits to what I’m okay with reading, I do not read anything death related, and I need to be hard-pressed for me to do a reading on love. Even when you are selling something more ritualistic, like a healing or a limpia, there is soul and passion put into it regularly, or maybe it is paired with a meditation or something of value to be pulled of it. This person is the absolute description of soulless. Dolls like him should not get involved in witch afairs.

Regardless of his questionable ethics, he completely nails it on the relaxation department, and so I went looking for more content on him. Enter A Healer’s Odyssey

I will not really cover much further from this video, this is already a long post as it is. I sometimes watch it in bed and fall asleep so I don’t think I have ever finished it while conscious. This video is Mr. Shaye narrating his journey with healing much like I’m doing mine today. The main reason I bring this up is that up to this point I’ve always believed he was a soulless healer, but after watching this I couldn’t help but think “Does he actually, genuinely believe in his healing after all?” or maybe I’m just getting sold into a lie. He sounds really convinced in his doings, but if that were to be the case why would he perform so dead inside.

This video also explains the signs he does while healing, or why he charts the legs of his patients. Which makes me appreciate his stuff a little bit more in the sense that I know what he is doing, rather than the act itself. I still think it is rather questionable, specially things with how he does the healings over the phone. Which, no shame, I guess it just not in tune with my sensibilities, but all I’ve mentioned adds up to him being a bad entity, like a lot other healers.

In the end, I’m still unsure of why I got obsessed with his work, or him as a person. Maybe is the soothing repetition, or maybe how he is just very particular healer who impacted me as absolutely shameless but then made me doubt even if I’m still leaning in that direction. Maybe is just a plain hyperfixation. All I can say is that his content as ASMR is fire.

More Saul

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